You know that bible story about the birth of Jesus and the little drummer boy that didn't have a gift so he played the drums? That's what I'm doing right here.
Carly is three years clean and sober today. I thought, what do you give someone who is this courageous and amazing? Nothing seems to 'say it'. So I thought I would do a little drummer boy but with words and not drums.
I've watched you turn into the person you always were. I've seen you become a beautiful young woman, who laughs so hard you have to hold your stomach, and cries without falling.
The past three years you have held up so many people who were falling apart. Including me. You did it with such strength and kindness and compassion. You give of yourself without ever being prompted because of a soulful and spiritual knowing that you're needed.
I know people don't really understand where you were, but it's important they know where you are now. Once I was doing a TV interview and they wanted you to come along. Who wouldn't want to do that? You. You said to me, "Mom. You enjoy all of that. But I like my little life. I love my boyfriend, my dog, I love my crappy job. I like to come home from work and watch movies with my boyfriend and my dog. I don't need anything else." You couldn't have described yourself better. But your life isn't little, it's simple. It's uncluttered and you don't need the insanity to be happy. Your life is as big as you desire and it is rolled out in front of you to be as complicated or as simple as you please. That's the amazing part to no longer being a hostage.
It's hard to imagine before when I watch the person you are now. You have become the person I go to when I wonder if I'm loosing my mind. I say, "Do you think I'm crazy if..." Then I launch in to a forty minute rant and you say, "Yes. I think you're crazy."
You hike and drink Chi Tea. You meditate. You juice your food. You believe in God and you pray. You nuture every part of your being so you will stay healthy. Although, I can twist your arm to eat a hot dog from Sams Club. You told me they were the greatest hot dogs in the world and you were correct.
My point is that I love this girl. I love to hear you laugh. I love having to go in your room and tell you and Andy to be quiet because you're wrestling and screaming and laughing. I love seeing how much you love Andy and he loves you. I don't like when you kiss your dog on the mouth. That will never change.
To say I'm proud of you would be a huge understatement. It's just not enough. You, Carly, are a fucking rock star. Three years clean and sober. Happy third:) I pray God will continue to bless you. You climbed a very steep mountain and your strength inspires me, your heart inspires me. I am so, so lucky to have a person like you in my life. I'm grateful every single day that I know you. I'm thankful that you have become the person that God brought you here to be and we are blessed to have you.
PS... I don't know how to play the drums or I would have:) Love, love, love you. Mum